All of that is great. But you do have to ask your families to back off….no pressure to work it out and no pressure to break it off. This is about you two no one else. I know they all would rather see you together and happy, but it’s not for them to get involved. You did a good job asking your mother to leave it be.
You did a very very good job of having fun and being light. She made the right choice in leaving too. You both still need some space and time.
Now, here’s the warning….it’s quite normal that after a great time, or day or weekend, the next time you see her, she’ll “pull back” or “lash out”. Basically, the WAS is distant or just outright mean. It’s part of the dance, caused by their confusion. Do NOT take it personal. I hated the back lash….but I was actually pretty good at dealing with it in person….then I would call, post or text everyone and vent to them. I never let it out in front of him, played it cool during the pull back. And the back lashes ended even before he started making efforts toward us again. So that’s my advice on that. Just understand, really, it’s not you, it’s her confusion…..”Wait a minute…..I had fun with him? But I told him we were through??? How could I have fun with him if I really think we’re done? Maybe we’re not done????? What????? What’s happening? I know what I’ll do, I’ll be mean to him…..that will show him to have fun with me!!!!” Seriously, I think that’s what goes through their heads during a pull back.
Crazy stuff.
Now that you are getting better at keeping it light, keep off the R talk. Keep it light. Keep it comfortable. Remember you, don’t have to entertain her, you just have to keep it comfortable when you are together. Got it?
