Nell, I don't think I was clear enough in my post....when I said my inlaws would be gone, I simply meant they would have gone home by Wed and then I would have no reason to be in touch with H. This would then provide the ideal background for me to pull back a little and leave H to make the contact, if any. My inlaws are the best, my children idolise them and my love for them will mean that they will always be such an important part of my life.

Oz, I am going to dinner. MIL travelled with me to the surgeon today so we talked a lot and she and FIL are happy for me to join the family and are not concerned at all. I will be there, doing my best to shine but my goal is to join in happily without trying to draw H into the conversation...I always enable him in this way and tomorrow I am responsible for me only.

The surgeon's visit went well and all my bandages are off now! I'm back to work next week smile I need to have more surgery later in the year and I'm booked in and ready to go! Yay

Cas