GIMA, You are not trying to bust up a affair so the advice to you is different. You are in limboland (the waiting place) though which is a dreary place. To get to this point what has been the journey: - bomb - introspection - work on valid issues for yourself - detach - lose some feelings for your spouse (doubts) - patience - things settle into new "normal"
Two fun and easy things for you: play with your kids and do fun stuff with them, ramp up your GAL activities. Make sure your wife knows she is invited but go have blast either way.
TCB - handle the things that have been issues
180s - go out and listen to some live music, guys weekend out, change something in the house/yard your ideas???? Do something different that is good for you.
LLs - keep filling her love bucket with no expectations, become irresistable
What are some things you did when you were dating?
You don't need to talk about the R now. You are trying to get her to jump in your lap. Your dogs will do anything for you, I bet your cat is confusing you. Be a cat whisperer.
You do have a say in where you are headed. Find your kid's copy of "Oh, the Places You Will Go" and pay attention the part about getting out of the waiting place. You have been chosen to be the leader of your family. You have been learning, growing, and thinking. Now it's time to keep taking action in the right direction. (Beware of your wife testing you.)
I had goals of trying one new thing a week, if it works keep it. As the thaw continues then you can become more bold and adventurous. Be self-aware, really listen, stay compassionate and have some fun. You can handle it.
Cheers Coach
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
