Have to meet my boss tomorrow. Getting all my ducks in a row, so they say. Sorted about 500 forms to find 17 kids who might qualify for my program...
Hope the meeting goes well tomorrow. Starting to get tired (almost 2 am here).
Starting to go numb. I don't know if there is anything my husband could do at this point that would surprise me. And you would think that would be shocking or depressing in itself. But instead I feel removed from it?
I am disappointed in myself that I even talked to him on the phone earlier tonight. How could I allow him to make small talk with me after texting me that he could not 'deal with me' anymore? That his hate of me spilled over onto his own children?
I realize now that I never allowed myself to fully rage at him for the sh!t he has pulled the past years. But so much has passed, at this point I don't even know why I would. I wish I had though, when I should have. Fear of losing him kept me from ever fully feeling the anger...dumb
