Did something new happen? If you are just stewing about the argument you just had and won, let it go. You won. You can still pull a divorce out of this situation if you try. Or you can let time move along until you can enforce rules on the conversation and peaceably negotiate the outcome, i.e., at Retrouvaille.
Just to answer the earlier question about IC/MC and awareness of Retrouvaille - my/our MC knew about it and even gave us a borchure on it. She encouraged us to go and we talked a lot about the program as I continued with her in IC sessios.
ME/XW:47 S21, D19, S15, S14 M:21 T:26 W moved 6/10 I filed 7/10 D final 4/12 remarried 8/12 W wants to R 12/10 and 4/11 but I decline
Did something new happen? If you are just stewing about the argument you just had and won, let it go. You won. You can still pull a divorce out of this situation if you try. Or you can let time move along until you can enforce rules on the conversation and peaceably negotiate the outcome, i.e., at Retrouvaille.
Just stewing about the R in general.
As I said, it's a good thing she is/was not home...
Just needed to be angry for a while.
Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2 M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08 Walking away from a bad situation.
Learning to not relive past arguments and keep rehashing them was on of the better things I took home from Retrouvaille. It's best when you can say something once and not have to mention it again. That happens when the other person cares about your feelings. You had the discussion about FB a while back, and she didn't care enough about your feelings to follow through. Now you have had the conversation again. She did what she said she would. Now you watch to see if she cares enough to stick to it.
I get very frustrated feeling like I am dealing with a rebellious child who I have to check up on all the time. I don't want to have to watch, and follow up on, and check up on my W. That's not the M I want to be in.
Anyway, not angry any more.
We just got through a discussion on spending and budgets with only a bit of tension. I didn't force a discussion on priorities or who was doing what - it was just a "family business meeting" to review where we are vs the budget, where we are jointly overspending, etc.
I was using quicken to go through it with her (I recommend the free quicken online tool for anyone looking for a quick and easy way to track spending vs budgets - it's pretty good). I had to go upstairs to get a child back into bed, and when I got back noticed that my facebook account was up on the screen. I did not have it open before, so she was snooping around my computer.
Good thing I had deleted the history on the browser before I started the review with her, or she may well have found Divorcebusting.
Last edited by Thinker; 08/21/0901:39 AM.
Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2 M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08 Walking away from a bad situation.
Today I am packing up the camping equipment - family trip this time. I said I was going to take the older boys camping this weekend, and (after flip flopping a bit) Mrs. Thinker wants to go too. This means that between meetings today I am digging out tents and sleeping bags and fishing poles and...
This is good. Camping was one of the first things we did as a couple, and was a part of our R that we lost over time.
Next week, we are driving as a family to visit MIL, so this means we will be out traveling around as a family (and not here at home) until Labor day. After that, the excitement of the first week of school for S4 and S6.
Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2 M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08 Walking away from a bad situation.
Thinker, Camping was one of the first things W and I did together also. We used to love it. We almost reserved a sight for this weekend for the family, as a matter of fact, but we were afraid of the weather. Our Retro is 3 weeks from today. I am anxious, excited, and nervous.
Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
