Again, She was talking about being unhappy and separating long before this guy entered the picture. She told me she wanted to go to retro on the day he said he would talk to her before she even met up with him. Plus, why would he send me an email out of the blue? He didn't know I suspected anything, neither did she. The texts were a lot, but they are all but gone now. Couldn't it be that she was reaching out to a childhood friend while she was hurting and overdid it a little? This guy is married, and from what I understand he is not leaving his wife, nor is he interested in mine. Going to the beach with no rings, I don't know why she didn't wear them that day, but she always wore them even when she met the other guy for the meetings. Even when she was on the boat, her rings were on, they were clearly seen on the pictures she put on facebook. But she did go with our kids and her sister. HER SISTER IS NOT COVERING FOR HER. I have a relationship with her sister, and I don't expect you to understand, but I believe her when she says she was with W at the beach. The boys told me what a great time they had at the beach, and again, facebook photos. Every time she goes out with her friends, there are the pictures of them, with none of him. I see on his facebook page of things he is doing related to his movie, and many nights he is either in meetings in his office, or out of town. They are not there to specifically put me off the trail as he uses his facebook page as a communication to others involved in the movie production. Finally, again, I don't care what you or anyone else says about this. Her faith would absolutely keep her from at the very least, a PA. One thing she has maintained in all of this is her strong faith. And if you knew her like I do, you would know that that is more important to her than me, the M, or even her life. She is in some sort of MLC, coupled with depression. It is clouding her feelings about me and the M. She isn't working on the R right now because she is counting on Retrouvaille to help her sort it all out. Not every M dissolves because of infidelity. I have been cheated on before. I lost my first wife to another man. I think I have some insight into my own W's actions. Both my ex and current. I learned a lot from my D with my first W about cheating. Our MC is not concerned about any affairs with W, and he has spoken to her solo a few times. Her confusion and wishy washy-ness is amplified whenever she has an appt. with her IC. I think she is trying to get W to move on, and sometimes W doesn't think it's a good idea, that she should stay. Thus the indecision. I am not a fool. I have analyzed over and over almost every move my w has made to the point that it has become all-consuming. I might climb a clock tower with a rifle one day, but it will be because of the energy I put into over analysis, not because W is having an affair.
Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
O, your wife sounds so much like my own wife, the way you describe her is so similar, especially the faith. The MLC the depression almost every detail. I hope the Retro weekend works for you, as I have said we leave tomorrow for ours and we are both putting alot of faith into it, it all comes down to faith.
At the end of this though I think we all know we need to be ok being alone, if that's the way this thing lines out, alone and healthy.... Keep the faith!
I will continue to pray for you.
Me 42, Her 34 M 3yrs, T 8yrs D 5 S 3 S 2 ILYBINILWY 02/09 Sleeping in same bed/with intimacy "I,m done" her words: 05/28/09 She's trying again 06/25/09 Second "I'm done" 07/11/09 She's trying again.
lg, count on my prayers being with you both this weekend. Please let me know how it went for you when you return.
Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
>Couldn't it be that she was reaching out to a childhood friend while she was hurting and overdid it a little?
naw, its perfectly fine for a wife to spend pretty much the entire day for a month entertaining another man. maybe they were sharing recipes and talking about shoes.
>Going to the beach with no rings, I don't know why she didn't wear them that day, but she always wore them even when she met the other guy for the meetings.
naw, entertaining more than one guy. perfectly fine. not overdoing it in my book. maybe he's got better meatloaf recipe.
>Her faith would absolutely keep her from at the very least, a PA. One thing she has maintained in all of this is her strong faith. And if you knew her like I do, you would know that that is more important to her than me, the M, or even her life.
I dont think you know your wife at all right now. you did once. As I read your thread, it seems to me you are either misrepresenting your wife to sound like a tramp or you are not really seeing what you are looking at. sorry to bust your ba77s man. you are not a fool; I just don't think you understand. You just dont do it for your wife anymore! and she is entering the sexual prime of her life. She is lining up her ducks! Practicing on them and searching out the right one. One of them ducks is gonna say the right thing at the right time and faith is going to go out the window. That is a given.
Entertaining more than one guy? What does that mean? 40 is the sexual prime? Why is it so important for you to think she is having an affair? What ducks are she lining up? Now she is having multiple affairs? And I don't believe faith is out the window from someone saying "the right thing"
Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
The reason W has a relationship now with her old friend is that she may be on the production company's payroll when the movie begins to shoot. He offered her an accounting position. She has been attending meetings so that potential backers see a full production company.
Me-40 W-41 Together-10 M-8 S-6 S-4 Bomb 5/08 Bomb 10/08 Thought things were better, was wrong. Still living together Wife doesn't think she will ever love me again.
