No I'm not telling who they are, sorry, because then they would know also, and only one of them does (maybe).
Actually, most of the people I posted to have moved on from here, which I think is sort of a shame. But they all have to deal with things in their own way I guess. Since the big D has come to most of them, I guess they just decided to go with it. And actually, not criticizing because they were/are good people, none of them have really done the work on themselves, just did things to see if they could make the situation different and if it didn't work, went right back to the same ol', same ol'.
I talk with a few of them offline still and it amazes me to see how after a year, they still are in the same place they were then, with themselves. One girl, it was a physically abusive R, H moved out, and still comes home just to beat her up. No exaggeration. So life goes on...You change when you are ready, if you are willing to do the work. That is the bottom line. If not, you just continue in your circumstances, allowing yourself to be the victim, and life happens to you (have watched a whole bunch of that in my H's family).
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
