Your wife thinks she is in love with a married man. (the so called friend.)
You ARE in denial as are others trying to help you on this thread.
The reason that she is acting so flakey going back and forth is this...
HE IS MARRIED. Since he is married, then she is reacting to him. Notice that she decided to go to Retro BECAUSE HE suggested it to her....
She has no real urgency to leave or divorce you because she isn't totally sure what HE is going to do. She is waiting on him. If he leaves his wife, she will leave you in a heartbeat.
You are in total and complete denial and others are enabling you...
This has been going on for quite some time....
You WANT a smoking gun? How about 1800 texts to each other in one month? THINK ABOUT THAT AGAIN. ONE THOUSAND EIGHT HUNDRED TEXTS? In one month? That is SIXTY texts a day... Wake up man... How about going to the beach without her rings? (convenient excuse) How about going on the boat with him? How about going out 3 times a week with girlfriends, her brother, etc. (yea right.. Naieve if you believe this nonsense) She is SNEAKING to meet him. Her brother is her cover. Her girlfriends are her cover. Going to the beach is a cover. How about no interest in working things out with you?
This IS an EA and a PA... You have been at this for too long to keep burying your head in the sand because you just DON'T WANT to face the actual facts of what is going on here.
YOU are getting played my man.. BADLY...
Change your game plan. This one isn't working. You are and have been enabling an affair. Right under you nose.
THAT is what is going on. Until you can face that and admit it and get a game plan based on those facts, then you will keep on spinning your wheels with little or no success.
ConfusedinPa made the same mistake you are making...
Please wise up. You are wasting your time on things that have nothing to do with what is really going on. AN AFFAIR. She believes she is in love with this OM. (also an ex of hers)(ex's are huge red flags)
Come on. Let's wake up and quit trying to act like you don't see the elephant in the room.
IF your wife didn't think she was in love with OM, then she WOULD be open to working it out with you. She would have nothing to lose. She wouldn't be up and down and wishy washy. When she is wishy washy, you have to understand that it has something to do with HIM.
Denial is getting you nowhere. Puppy has tried to tell you this numerous times, but others keep butting in and pushing you back into denial... Time to get out of denial and into reality... I have been doing this for 20+ years. I am correct in my assessment.
Your game plan should be based on the facts, not on what you HOPE. Reading your first post on this site isn't much different than reading the latest post. I would suggest that what you are doing isn't working. Change your game plan.
