Divorce not busted 2

[Orich]

Thank you, GIMA. I now do understand. You have put it in a way that makes sense to me. I get it. You have explained to me what may very well be going on in my Ws head, and at the same time have raised my hope again. I will continue to try and detach as best as I can. I want to level the playing field, and fear isn't going to help me do that, so I will give my fear to God, again, as best as I can, and continue to do what I can to detach. It isn't easy, but with a better understanding of why it needs to be done, I can handle it a bit better. I am still very sad, but will try to keep a PMA and do things for me. For example, next week I am off from work and W is not. I took the week to stay with my boys to avoid child care expenses. I plan on taking them to a place we always used to go as a family. It will be rough, but the boys will love it.
I really liked what you said at the end about God's plan. I feel also that God doesn't intend for me to be alone, and of course I always just figured that I was supposed to be with my W. I still hope that is true, but never thought about a third person who God knows might need me more than W does. I will bring that whole idea to evening prayer tonight. I notice we are the same age. It does me good hearing someone the same age as me positive about his future. Age never bothered me before, but going through this sometimes I get worried about starting over at 40.
Thank you so much for taking the time to respond. I have gotten a lot out of your post.