Dylan-- Glad you came on here to vent and reach out, and not to her...
It is an ingrained thing you are changing, and it does take time, and it's really, really hard. I actually felt like I was going through withdrawal. The main thing that got me through it was to stop communication altogether - cold turkey. Only email. And, that took months. Now, I am still more comfortable with email, since it is much more difficult for x to push buttons that way. And, as time goes by, I have gotten stronger to resist the pull when he tries to justify all that happened on my head.
I know you want to co-parent. I know that I have been much better at that since going to email-only. You have to find the amount of direct communication with her that is workable - it is different for everyone. And can change as you grow stronger.
