The only little thing that might possibly suggest that she still has feeling for me is her agreement to hold off on divorce if I stopped harassing her about seeing OM.
Sorry, but this suggests to me that she wants to be able to do what she wants without the messy ramifications of a divorce. It is emotional blackmail.
However, it does buy you time and you can get your sh*t together and be the better man in the mean time. I guess. Since you feel culpable here (which I understand), I can see the value in giving it some time.
