You didn't make a mistake by reconciling your M. Its what you should do. It sounds like there is just more work to do. Have you and your H tried a sex therapist? I know it is a bit different than regular C, but that seems to be the issue for you and him according to your post. I have never been to one so I can't really speak with any knowledge on one. But it could be worth a try for yall.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...