He doesn't hate you; he hates himself. He is destroying every good thing in his life, and it seems that is his only chance of ever learning anything.
Better off without THIS flavor of Dan.
I truly believe this is the case. He hates himself so much but cannot accept that so instead, he decides he hates me. He texted me that I am the common denominator in all of his years of being unhappy. This was a response to me b/c I responded to the first text then stopped responding, even though he has sent more...
I had texted him that he has been unhappy for years and hates his entire life, job, etc. that he is the common denominator and only he can choose to be happy.
So anyway he sent back that"Since unhappiness started you are the common denominator I give you 100 percent and when I need you you sh!t on me That's the f@cking problem"
As I mentioned, I did not respond. Of course the 'when I need you' part refers to the farm issue....I can see where he thought he was giving me 100% up to a certain point in our marriage, but once he had an affair and moved out, that is hardly 100%. And he can't see that my still being here at all, 2 years into this bs, is me being here for him. I would be here when he needed me if he ever let himself need me and admitted he had a problem.
Mike, I know I would have the upper hand if I filed. I am dreading the whole divorce process. More of a chance for him to play the victim, because I am sure he will spin it that I am a heartless bitch who is taking him to the cleaners, keeping him from living his dreams by draining him of money, etc etc....
I don't want to get down in the mud with him and make threats about the lawyers, the settlement, etc etc. But I will not roll over, either. My attorney will be using the forensic accountant to sort out what is up with the farm business, what is on his credit card he supposedly uses for work, etc etc. And i have been keeping track of just how much time he does(n't) spend with his kids, so 50/50 for settlement purposes is out of the question. I would have loved him to have 50/50 b/c the kids want him, but he told me and has shown me that he doesn't have the time for 50/50...
