Ok...not having such a good day today. Kinda emotional today...not about missing H or anything like that, just other things. I wish I had a man I could depend on to do stuff for me around here. There are some things I just cant do. I have tons of leaks in my shop today because of the rain and I really cant afford to hire anyone to fix them. I have to figure it out myself or beg my dad to find time to fix them. OR ask my H again to do it, which after a while I get tired of asking him...especially when I have to remind him of it again and again.
He texted me today and I told him about the leaks....he called me and instead of saying hey, hello or anything he said "What is it". Well, that upset me...why cant he just talk nice to me? His whole convo was very sarcastic and all that...he even said "do you want me to leave work and go there and fix it?".
UGH!!!!!!!!!! Grow up boy! Bet he wouldnt talk to his other "women" friends that way!!
Whatever! WOnt ask him again....I will ask my daddy (which my H hates for me to do).
Say a prayer for me today....I need it!
Kissak
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
I'm so sorry you are having such a rough day. It stinks to feel like you have to depend on others to take care of things for you, but you can certainly ask your dad for help. Why does your H hate for you to ask your dad? That seems strange.
ok....just realized I said that something your H did seemed strange! HA! He IS strange!
Love you kissak! Don't let the stress get you too down.
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
My H's one complaint when he left was how I always put my parents before him and how I would always ask my dad for help and not him. Of course he imagined alot of it and alot of times I just knew my dad would know a solution and my H wouldnt...or it would be simply because my H was never around! I always depended on my parents alot in my marriage...the first year and a half of my marriage, I lived alone...my H was in the military and was gone...who else could I ask? So he gets really irritated when I do ask my dad...but who cares now?
Im trying not to let the stress get me down...but every now and then it happens, just doesnt last for too long...plus all this rain is making for a dreary day!
Thank you Mishka! Your a great friend to have! Wish you lived closer!!
Kissak
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
I don't blame you one bit for going to your Dad to help you. I would go to my Dad too if H spoke to me in such a condescending manner....
You have made it a point not to ask H for much of anything and the language and tone in his return call implied you were asking. He was way off the mark on that one....
It's like they can't be bothered with us when it's on our terms and at our urgence. It's quite another matter when they come around looking for help and sympathy. It really is beyond aggravating.
I would get the leaks fixed somehow on my own. Do you have a brother or brother-in-law that could help you before your Dad can get to it? For piece of mind and with fall and winter coming it would take a lot off of you if the leaks were fixed up nice.
I hope by now you have actually figured this problem all out. I didn't post much for a week and a half or so and have just gotten back into it over the weekend and today. Sorry if I'm too late on this one.
Take care,
Hope the sun's shining down there. We are in 90 degrees plus and humid. So sunny it's hard to stand out in it.
Sanderika
ME48/H48MLC T 33y M 28y S16 OW 8/7/05 Bomb 8/16/05 Sep 9/05 H f'd D 10/3/08 D pp'd 1/20/09,7/24/09,12/4/09 D dismissed 2/5/10 H served me D papers again 9/4/10 D dismissed 9/26/11
Thanks for checking in on me Sanderika....I am working on getting my leaks fixed...I am praying that this hurricane doesnt decide to pay us a visit later this weekend either!! My dad I going to fix it and my H said he would help him. So, we'll see who gets to it first! I dont really have any other handy men that can get to it for me....
H is all up and down lately. NOthing unusual..and your right...when they want sympathy and help they expect it from us....but let us need help and its a bother.
oh well....I have to say that I ran into this guy I went out with a couple of times last year....he hasnt seen me since before last december...well, he couldnt say much to me because my kids were with me, so it was just a little chit chat how u doing kinda stuff...well about 30 minutes after I saw him He sent me a text...it said "you were looking good today, I couldnt stop looking at you!"
OMG! I was blushing and giggling like a teenager...my kids were like "mom whats so funny".
haha..I have lost about 20 pounds since this guy saw me last....funny....i sent him back an email later saying it was good to see him....he replyed that it was good to see me and he couldnt stop thinking about me all day!
I still giggle when I think about it! Its so nice to be wanted in some way...or just even thought about as attractive!
It just made my day!!! Things like that always get me thinking about what I really want...what I really deserve.
Kissak
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
You have just received a wonderful boost for your self-esteem and outlook.
Right you are!!!!!
It feels absolutely wonderful when you hear and see that you are still attractive and desired. I assume he is thinking desire, afterall he said he couldn't stop thinking about you. I bet you hear from him again real soon....
I would be giddy with joy too!!!
WANT: You want to be happy. You want your marriage with H to reconcile. You want to reunite your family. You want to be free of this MLC turmoil and live days without burdens.
DESERVE: You deserve to be happy. You have worked hard to bring H back to the marriage, therefore you deserve the marriage. You deserve your family to be whole. You deseerve to live free from burdens and turmoil brought on by a MLC H.
You live like I do, with the hope that one day they will leave the MLC life and return. In the meantime there are choices to be made by us. How long do we settle for what we have now? How long do we wait for our Hs? What are we waiting for? What do we truly want? What is our destiny supposed to be?
You have mentioned before that H is very jealous of you and any possibility that you will meet someone new. Should you decide to explore....AND....IMO you deserve to at this point in time, it will be a real awakening for H. H has strung you along long enough. It will be the awakening for H, so very similar to the awakening H gave kissak back on 12/23/06!!!
Maybe H needs an actual threat to his messed up world.
I am beginning to believe that our Hs are delusional if they think we are going to wait forever. Should you decide to open a friendlier friendship with the "guy" make sure you are ready for something new. This one might have some promise to it, providing you also have interest.
Glad to see your Dad and H coming together for you on the leaky roof. I do hope they get it fixed by the weekend. They are talking about this storm up here too for early next week. Sounds like it might be powerful.
Take care and hugs to you,
Sanderika
ME48/H48MLC T 33y M 28y S16 OW 8/7/05 Bomb 8/16/05 Sep 9/05 H f'd D 10/3/08 D pp'd 1/20/09,7/24/09,12/4/09 D dismissed 2/5/10 H served me D papers again 9/4/10 D dismissed 9/26/11
Youre right, I do want to be happy....thats what we all want though.
Really I just want to be out of this whole MLC mess. I feel like my life is just in a stand still. Not moving forward, or backwards...its just here. It is what it is...I try not to think about that and take one day at a time, but how is that moving anywhere??
I have worked hard and waited along time for my H to "WAKE UP".
He is still the same though...even coming by yesterday to get the kids he hinted that he wanted some...well, you know. I looked at him like he was crazy! There was no 'wow u look nice today' or anything it was just sexual hints....thats when I said, "you know you could just say how nice i look today or wow, your looking good after loosing all that weight or you could have said the things "OTHER" guys are saying like wow I just couldnt keep my eyes off of you!!!"
HAHA...couldnt resist that one! lol....he didnt seem like it bothered him though. WHo cares???!!!
Im still not sure about pursuing other R yet....I really want to wait until I have closure on my marriage first. I really cant even begin to understand how to let go of my love for H and give it to someone else....that all confuses me. Im weird I guess...I dont see how I can be in another R like that right now. H was my only love....so how do you even begin to think about loving someone else like that and all....just things i think about alot.
Im having a better day...business is finally picking back up. I really hate it being soooo slow in the summers.
Kissak
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
K, I think that it is very hard to resist the interest. We are vulnerable.
I now have one guy who seems moderately interested and another who is quite interested.
That said, I am glad I have not gotten involved with anybody. As you said, figure out the deal w/M first. At least it means you don't jump out of the frying pan and into the fire.
M: 16 years Bomb 4/07 OW 20s long gone Divorced 11/09 I remarried New Guy Cooperative r w/X regarding D
Has the roof been fixed? Looks like we are all going to dodge Hurricane Bill.
Any thing new happening?
Hope you are having a great weekend....
Take care,
Sanderika
ME48/H48MLC T 33y M 28y S16 OW 8/7/05 Bomb 8/16/05 Sep 9/05 H f'd D 10/3/08 D pp'd 1/20/09,7/24/09,12/4/09 D dismissed 2/5/10 H served me D papers again 9/4/10 D dismissed 9/26/11
I think it is a very wise decision for me to wait till I know for sure 100% that My marriage is over before starting another R with anyone. I dont think its fair to anyone else if I can still say that I might would take him back. One guy that i have become friends with knows this and is very understanding and is just that...a friend.
Sanderika...not much new happening. Roof still isnt fixed...but I just may have to put a ladder up there and do it myself! lol
H is acting the same...Always interested in what Im doing and all. He even has sent me a couple of texts today that said for me to smile and one where he said "hey Beautiful". I dont put much thought to it anymore though...because if I was to ask him what that was supposed to mean he would just say he was trying to be nice....all I said though was thank you. Im not sure what he is up to today...honestly I have given up on trying to figure him out anymore...I know what i really need to hear and see to know that there is a change....him complimenting me isnt it. Its nice to hear and all, but he has told me that before.
ANyway! My kids go back to school tomorrow! Im more excited then they are and they are really excited!! lol. Im just ready to get back on a routine again.
Im hoping to start my exercise routine back too! In the last 3 years Ive lost about 57 pounds! I only have about 2 more to lose to met my current goal!! Im so happy that I have done it! Next goal is only 20 pounds, then thats it!! I will have all off and can start working on just maintaining it...so I will be able to eat a few more things that I like and enjoy!!!
Hope all of you have a great day!!
Kissak
"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3 M-37 H-37 S-10, D-15 M- 1993 First bomb- 12/23/06 Came and went too MANY times! Gone again 10-25-10
It stinks to feel like you have to depend on others to take care of things for you, but you can certainly ask your dad for help. Why does your H hate for you to ask your dad? That seems strange.