Now, as a part of your DB path, you are even at the point where you aren't sure you are interested in the M anymore. Is that really the case, or is it more of what you want to think to deal best with things?
I honestly don't know the answer to this question.
I am definitely not interested in the M I had -- but I've said that often, both here and with MC's. That M is indeed dead. It died the day WAW delivered the bomb. Because it's tainted, right? Something/many things/everything in it was "wrong," so I have to move beyond it.
That being said, I am open to possibilities, including -- as I have been saying nearly since Day 1/Square 1 -- a new M that just happens to have the same 2 people in it.
Right now I can't make any evaluations. But your last query gets at the dynamic, I think -- I need time to make evaluations. About me, about her, about the M, about the kids. And I can only do that, as Schnarch writes, by experience.
@robx:
Quote:
Remember it was her decision originally to have an affair and she was moving on with her new life, it was her decision and her validation for that decision was that you weren't the best option. Now that she sees you aren't broken hearted, that you will carry on and not just survive, you will thrive & flourish it throws her entire decision & the rationalizations behind it out of whack.
I warned her it would suck to be her, but she didn't want to listen.
Nooooo -- it all seemed so easy, didn't it? Drop the bomb, sleep with Signore, be faboo co-parents and bestest buds and lead the swingin' Signore life with travel and fine wine and lovely restaurants and good ol' SP watching the kids and toting the load -- and of course having enough "male self-respect" (as she put it) to never ENTERTAIN the idea of alimony! -- and gosh-o-mighty why didn't we do this before?
And now? Now SP's on the Great European Getaway and having a perfectly splendid time.
Now it does indeed suck to be her. And her fallback strategy is, "You really, really broke my heart; make it better by agreeing to do what I want."
I'm not going to rub it in, and I am going to guess that watching our kids in the/"my" house has really rubbed some open wounds.
But....too frickin' bad. Boo-frickin'-hoo. Buy the ticket; take the ride.
