I thought I was feeling more detached tonight. Maybe I'm just tired, or just numb. Played games again tonight. W had a headache so I rubbed her head / neck. Well, then:
W talked to her mom on the phone - afterwards, said that the boys had asked to spend Labor Day with in-laws, and W will be out of town. I felt really annoyed - said, I thought we were going to do family stuff. And she says: Yes, but we're not functionaling like that right now...
Dammit. Well, of course, I can spend Labor Day with my boys, it's not a control issue. But I realize, yeah, they're going to spend time with their grandparents at some point. Might not be a bad time for me to rest and focus on myself. But kind of jarring to think of not being with my family. This sucks.
We're going to the baseball game this weekend, and the state fair the weekend after that. But these are family things, not H&W things.
Feel like I'm treading water, when I need to be swimming. Am I still just impatient?
W is coming to C session on Thursday. At least I think she is, she's still rearragning her schedule.
------------- Well, told W I'm not ready to spend Labort day w/o the kids. OK, no big deal. She had just slipped into her room without fanfare... Boys came up and said they couldn't sleep and "wanted comfort" - turns out they had goldfish and Gramma's that had died - 1 still alive - that's why they wanted to go there.
