K, I have not posted to you often, but I have been around here long enough to value your wonderful spirit and the love and sunshine that you share.
I am older than you, and came here to work on my second marriage. Your story however, could be a replay of my own first marriage. Your 3 years of lies was 5 years for me. We had 3 reconcilations with marriage counseling, and it was only after I found all of OW cards and letters (before email was common)that I walked away and never looked back. It was a very low point in my life.
But life does go on. I want to tell you that I totally understand what you are feeling. If there is any way that I can help you, please let me know.
My H and I did divorce. It was very ugly and bitter and my 2 children paid a terrible price. My H never did remarry, but still sees/dates the OW occasionally. (lol, it's been 17 years!)
In my heart I know that he still loves me. We have worked out a relationship for our grown kids and grandkids, but he is a lonely and unhappy man. I still do not know how a man could live the lies that he did, but it seems that others have done the same thing.
I know that someone mentioned the book "Not Just Friends" to you. Please read it. It explains so much! Also, be gentle with yourself. Do what you must to protect you and your kids, but try not to make life decisions while you are in so much pain.
We all love you. hope
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
