Just Keep Livin' #3

[JKL2009]

It has been a little while since I posted things here. I have been doing my DB stuff, doing OK. We have moved ahead with getting the house ready to sell. We have a target date to list a few weeks out from now, things are progressing. The other day we signed the agreement with the realtor, and the WAW commented that she didn't think I would do it. She still thinks I am this person who she can't trust and is out to fight her in every way. I am glad when she observes that not happening.

This weekend WAW found a place she will rent. Good neighborhood, safe, good for her commute to work and for school next year perhaps. She said she dreaded coming home because she thought I would be angry and upset since she had found a place. Again, proved her wrong.

We did some packing this weekend. Boxed up picture frames, some "knick knacks" from the wedding, etc. I saw her shed some tears, and she said this is all really hard and this was not the life she ever pictured having, and even though she has thought about leaving me for years things are getting very real. She is most vocal about the financial hit of this all, and has stressed that many times as well as that I have spent money when we were married in a manner she didn't like as a main reason to the demise for our relationship.

I tried to remember some great words I saw on this board, from SmileyPerson and others, and hopefully channeled some of it. Told it is hard on us all, but we need to get some space so we all can think about things and get some freedom to breath.

Today she could barely get out of bed to go to work. She really was out of it, like she had a huge case of depression hit her. I think it is fair to say she is having a hard time with the reality of this all. I am too, but I am doing pretty well.

My biggest concern right now is how to talk to S4 about this. I am more concerned than WAW right now; she thinks he is too young to understand but I think he will get it more than she thinks. She also is coming from a family that parents divorced when she was 7, and she thinks of it as a positive thing. I'll be researching more on how to talk to my son, but any advice out there is appreciated.

So in the next few weeks she will be moving out, and S4 will primarily live there and me about 35% of the time. I'll stay at the house until we sell and close, then find a new place. I am trying to focus on me, detaching, and dealing tactically with WAW and her struggles. I'll be hitting the boards more to read and review. Right now, as much as possible, "just smile and wave" is the motto.