#65 finally!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[AliSuddenly]

Oh M, thats terrible, must have been horrible to read. I'd have done the same though, wanted to read everything. This is so hard though, you've gone from being suspcisious of her (yes, never admitted by him, but he must have told her then that you had found out?).. to knowing they had a PA and now all this, it seems it was more of a relationship and that must hurt so much. I guess with him being gone so long and you had so little contact if you remember, Nov - Aug 08, he was bound to be in a full blown R with her. My bf was too.. I saw him TWICE in 6 months!! I am sure if I read emails from Helen it would hurt just as much, and yet, shes nothing to him now.

I cant lessen your hurt, but to try and counter a little.. dont forget this was HER letter not his.. she was desperate, going nuts you said. It sounds like a LOT of pressure from her, it sounds like she is almost presenting evidence to him..look, look how this was with us, look how it could work.. dont leave me. She must have written it for a reason. He tells you things were bad the past 3 months with her (?) and he was trying to end it. It is now over and he wants nothing to do with her, right? I dont know when the email was written, but even if it was ages ago, its from her perspective, how she sees it, she may well have been and probably still is, deeply in love with him. I get the impression its not recipricated though. So take heart.

As for meeting your son.. was that planned or accidental? As for the pregnancy, ditto Dawn. Sorry you had to read that, you must feel like you are having your insides torn out. Its going to be hard with the kids, but of course he should take over a bit, or at least not assume you will just keep being the primary carer for them.. you BOTH work full time for goddsakes!! Its that kind of thing that makes me mad.. men being chauvanistic, or, just not taking responsibility. I'm home this evening, call anytime, thinking of you and feeling for you M,
Al xxx