WAW - Very confused and devastated - pt 11

[confusedinpa]

Thanks Deep.

I actually had a very long conversation with Stronger as I was driving to NY. I'm still trying to process all that we had talked about relative to forgiving infidelity. It was great talking with her as she so openly shared her own life experiences. It was really great talking to someone who was supportive as well as take the time to listen to me drone on about the crap in my situation and just vent.

It just seems so impossible right now to envision my WAW showing any signs of remorse/regret, let alone forgiving, as all the crap is so fresh. Not just the infidelity and the graphic details of their glories awaiting for the next encounters, but what gets me most angry was the punishment she put me under the past year. Tell me how it was all my fault she needed time and space to heal and how she is so hurting still. All the while she is professing how head over heals she is to some other guy and how she was enjoying life. It seemed so cruel, it should be criminal.....

So how do you forgive that? Do you forgive someone who tortured for months just to justify their own insanity?

Good thing I have a therapy appointment tomorrow.....

Maybe I should join the anti-depressant club that is floating around here......