Gosh, do they all read the same book?! You know, How to End Your Marriage in Ten Easy Steps .
Oh yeah, I got the "symptom not a cause" thing too. Not from xH--'cuz even now he won't admit there's an OW, even while D spends a lot of time with her and family. But from a good friend--who, to my great amazement, placed all the blame on me. Of course, xH had his ear for months--and no one ever bothered to clue me in. xH was very very good at deflecting blame and spinning it so he was the victim. I think that's Chapter 8.
And of course, the whole business of who actually ended the marriage. xH suggested lightly that we file jointly so he could get on with his life (oh, of course, whatever you want, dear). Of course, that was he could tell people--as your Mrs. is intending--that it was a mutual agreement. No thank you, I said--if you want it, you do it, because I really want no part of it. Chapter 3.
No culpability, no responsibility, no accountability. So they can be both the perpetrator and the victim. Brilliant strategy, ain't it?
M60 H52 D20 M14 yrs OW-old gf from 1986 bomb-5/18/08 H filed for D-9/10/08 D final 4/24/09 xH remarried (not OW) 2012
