I wanted to report on the custody suit that xW filed against me to try to wrest sole custody of our two S's. I will first recap by saying that five months after she decided to break off negotiations and file the lawsuit, she suddenly decided in the closing weeks before the custody hearing to say she would consider settling her case. She said she would agree to the status quo of 50-50 shared parenting if I would give up some of the clauses in the proposed agreement.
I have had a hard time believing xW (still don't) or her motives, especially that she would suddenly want to settle a case she had been doggedly pursuing. After all, she was the one who filed the suit to begin with, right when we were finalizing the settlement and parenting agreement.
xW's L and my L continued to negotiate for a settlement, even when xW seemed to be getting cold feet. There was also a last minute wrinkle (that I will speak more on later) that raised xW's ire and led me to believe that she would again bail out of negotiations.
In the end, we gave some concessions to xW but she did agree to the terms for 50-50 shared parenting as long as there was an assigned parenting coordinator (PC).
So, I am quite relieved to report that we have both signed the agreement and it was presented to the judge during our scheduled custody hearing yesterday (Friday, the 14th). This battle is now over. It does not necessarily mean the war is really over however, but I am at last at peace.
I have a lot of people to thank for all their continuing prayers. Folks here in the DB forums, my support group, my friends and family.
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About that "wrinkle".
Let's just say that xW recently discovered how I initially gained the intel about her and the OM two years ago on the night of "the bomb". That fateful night I discovered and subsequently commandeered a free email account she had opened up to have illicit conversations with the OM. Only now is xW understanding just how much information I had gleaned about her treachery. And she is upset about it, claiming I violated her privacy and that what I did was a "cyber-crime".
What's maddening is that I had told her two years ago that I had discovered their emails to each other, and that was how I knew about their affair. But I guess she just doesn't really listen like she thinks she does. Instead she had to rediscover this old forgotten account.
I am relieved that she decided not to use this to back out of signing the consent order this week.
But she did raise this matter up again today in another snide email remark, so she is still very much upset about it. I have my own serious beefs against her, as expected, but I am putting those aside. So I've decided that on this and any other matter that doesn't concern our children that I will refrain from responding.
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I have related on other people's threads how I am struggling with xW's continually foisting of OM on our S's lives. My S's were both going on and on last week about how "Mr. OM" would roughhouse with them in the swimming pool. Not only do I not like the fact this unsavory person is trying to worm his way into my S's lives but I especially do not appreciate a strange man touching my sons for extended periods, whether in play or not. It is not his place, and it is totally inappropriate.
