I'm really proud of myself, if not modest, haha! I am obsessing so much less. I have this confidence lately that I am doing well and I'm going to be fine. I'm sure I'll have my setbacks, but I am confident that I can be alone and I can be a good partner for someone someday. Saw my C yesterday and she said she's never had a patient like me. (uh oh!) Haha - I think she means that I'm not falling apart, and I'm being patient with my H but not sitting around feeling sorry for myself.
I spent the day at a fundraiser for my S17's basketball buddy's family that was in a serious accident. It was a perfect Colorado day for a carwash and flag football game against the football team. I'm going to cry buckets when my kids leave for college (1 yr for my S, 2 for my D16). But I plan to make the most of these years, volunteer at school, and go to the games, etc. I wish my H would want to be with us, but he just can't.
H's b-day is Mon. I talked to my dtr about trying to take the high road, and send him a msg (I probably should too, but very neutral). I guess he did for her bday which I didn't know before. Told her that I firmly believe he's going thru some hard times right now (depression and/or mlc) and he's just not capable of reaching out to her right now. It's not that he's intentionally abandoned her; he just can't see beyond his own issues right now. I pray that someday he can mend these fences, but for now she seemed to accept my thoughts pretty well.
All for now - off for some fun with a friend tonight and enjoying my wknd. Didn't see Dad today but his bday is tmrw so I'll spend some time reading or watching football with him tmrw.
