What is to be gained with playing the game of I'm married, I'm not married?" It's called stringing Peace along. A lot of the walkaways will do this. It's keeping one foot in the new pond and one in the old because they do not want to let go of the person they left behind. They want to make sure your are there when they want you and your attention, sympathy, etc.
Peace, step way back and allow his new wife to deal w/him and his health issues. I think you are very wise in not allowing your son to stay over there, especially with his allergies right now. Your xh has to really hit bottom once again and he will not do it as long as he's not facing the consequences of his actions.
Keep the focus on you and your son. You cannot rescue him.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
