In Limbo

[d1adsl5a]

Mach,

I made my first step not talking to someone today who asked me how I was doing. So lets call this day 1. To this point, I have been able to keep most of it under raps as to who I was talking to about things. The issue really is my family, couldn't really hide it from them. She more or less has "divorced" them already. This was her decision to not face them. My family would welcome her back. They do see the pain she is in and understand the baggage. Glad you agree that you see it as a MLC. I was starting to question what it really was after this letter. I just hope she does figure things out. You are right from an earlier note. I am here because I have chosen to stay and try. Leaving at this point would give me so many what if's...She needs so much help, I just hope she gets it. The old crew she is now hanging out with that she terms her "dear friends" are either divorced, alcoholics, recovering alcoholics, 40+ and single etc....Not the best crew for a support group. It is guilt free fun for her. Nothing wrong with it. I just feels it delays the process of her really trying to come to terms with what is going on within her. I know I can't fix anything but watch on the sidelines with the kids. Everything surrounds her "friends" at this point because her whole family thinks that she is horrible for doing this. I just want to raise my hand and say--the friend you need is right here, your family is right here...But I do know she cannot see that right now.

I have validated her pain. I also learn every day what works and what doesn't. Yesterday was a bad day for me after reading this. Today is much better. I am/have done the work to make a better me, just hope she actually starts. I suppose recognizing how you got here is the first step...