Wow, thank you for your words of encouragement. We have been seeing the MC since March and since that time she has gone from "wanting to want to" to this. And yes there is/was an OM. He was a guy from my kids school that became a family friend and more. She swears it was nothing physical and she was emotionally connected to him due to lack of that to me. She also says that problems in our M have nothing to do with OM, and while I do agree that we had some problems with my temper (which now is very under control, I don't lash out verbally ever anymore) and my lack of deep emotional connection, we did have good times (lots of them) and it wasn't until he came into the picture that she really changed her personality and everything towards me and her family. This OM did work for the family business but now he is gone and still doesn't have a job after about 4 months. He is also the basketball coach for my D's team which really makes things awkward and bad. I think that she definitely still has feelings for him and that is in part fueling this separation with me.
I will go back and reread the books, its been since January that I read them and a lot has happened in that time. I never really grasped the concepts and didn't give the space she needed.
I am hoping that this is just script and that she will not go out and get a lawyer and file right away. I don't think she will do that, but I didn't think she would ever get with anyone else either.
When I wrote the working tirelessly on myself, I mean that in the best way possible. I need and want to do this for myself and if it helps to soften my W's heart then that is just a bonus. But that is definitely what I want to happen eventually and if it doesn't then I will have to reevaluate what I want in life if she will not be apart of it. I try not to think about those things, but after yesterday it seems like I should think of that possibility now.
Thank you again for posting and I hope you will keep up with me in the future because I definitely need it.
