Agh! He's detached completely!

[IWillSaveOurMarr]

Dear HHH,

Nope, no judge ordered the MC or workshop yet. In fact, at this hearing we get the "Family Court Commissioner" to rule on this, not the judge, and this isn't for about 2 weeks. I got the idea from my H because he said he'll only go "if a judge makes me go", so I thought, "what the heck- why not try and ask for it?" Apparently, one of the attys I consulted with told me that MC used to be mandatory in this state, but that was 20 years ago. In this case, I think "progress" made things worse, not better!

I've heard of Retrovaille, and wish you the best of luck should you be able to get the cooperation of your WAH. I will fill you in on the results of our hearing once I know more.

I submitted to the court an official request for a hearing, (from the courts website) because I needed maintenace, as well as a letter written in "legal style" that I downloaded on Word and modified, stating just the facts about our short marriage and what I wanted in this hearing, the MC and workshop as well as maintenance and almost most importantly, for him to stop spending ridiculously and foolishly as he's been doing. Then I also included a copy of the marriage workshop flyer and had to make 6 copies of everything and send it into the court. So it was a bit of a pain, and I actually did it incorrectly the first time around and didn't send enough and to the wrong people, but I feel it was worth it to have a last ditch effort to try to salvage this marriage. I feel like I've offered it up to god/the universe/fate, and that I've done all I can and I can't do anymore. At least though, should this divorce go through, I feel like I won't have any lingering doubts that I didn't try everything within my power to try to help my husband see the light.

I wish you luck, and take care.