I know I just wailed you, but I wanted to write here aswell. don't you dare meet her. You're better than that and you know it. You told me once to stop giving the aubergine power over me by mentioning her and thinking about her. Well, it's the same thing here....
You're not mad for feeling compassion. Obviously if your H is turning on the waterworks you're going to feel sympathetic towards him. That's because you're such a loving and compassionate person. But don't do the 'quick forgive' and agree to talk. Don't speak to him at all. let him see the full implications of his behaviour for himself and without any contact from your family/friends etc. The only contact, IMHO, should be with his kids. Then he'll really see what he's done. And then.... let's see.
