Okay, friends, I`m going to let the dust settle. I have to pook at the positives from this:
H knows I`m not afraid of the S step so he can`t hang that over me. He knows I`m not afraid to challenge him for intimidating me He knows I`ll always stick my fingers in my ears if he starts ranting! He knows I`ve researched S-at least to a degree. He knows I don`t hate him He has acknowledged that I have changes. He knows I can keep my cool.
Dawn thanks for you very extensive and insightful post-esp the bit about not being able to control what H says to the kids;important for me to realise that and to settle for damage limitation if need be.
The only reason I brought up S this morning is because H brought it up as a given on Sat and I wanted to clarify what his position was on it and remind him what mine was("I don`t want S but if that`s what you want I won`t stop you either")
Storm
Yes, I`m glad I took the fear factor out of S for me. I wanted H to see that I wasn`t afraid to go there so he couldn`t hang it over me and also that it was his decision to make.
Cat
Sorry to hear about your weekend! Yes, I don`t know how long this type of situation is tolerable. The things that help me most are having fun, having friends and investing in a vibrator!
But still, there are times of deepest despair and loneliness. I thought you two were doing better lately. Hope the weekend is just a temporary set back.
