Well, another weekend down. Kids go back to school tomorrow. And they are actually both excited. Little one (D5) has her first day of "big girl school." S9 has his first day of public school (he's been at a private school until now - ADHD was one of their specialties). D5 hasn't a care in the world, but S9 is a little nervous.
The day went great as far as I can tell. W seems to be warming up. Lots of laughing, joking, and everything is positive. Had to get new tires today (had been putting it off) after one of them sprung a leak. Normally, this would have created a lot of tension over $$. Not today. W took it in stride, and so did I.
I suppose we are still just going through the friend stage. Beats the alternative, and I am thankful for that. My lack of patience is peeking in for a look. I know I will be fine either way this thing plays out.
Maybe I'm just missing the good times from before, and I would like to have those again, except in the new and much improved R we could have.
Right now, we are both great parents and apparently friends. Anybody seen the fast forward button? I seem to have misplaced mine.
It must be with mine along with 837,000 single socks missing from dryers around the world.
Thank you for the prayers on my thread earlier. Gramp is doing much better! They may discharge him tomorrow which is amazing because this was a very nasty GI issue.
The trouble with having an open mind is that people put things in it.
My sitch - Divorce Busted! http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1804137#Post1804137
Thank you for the prayers on my thread earlier. Gramp is doing much better! They may discharge him tomorrow which is amazing because this was a very nasty GI issue.
My pleasure.
I still have a set of grandparents who are alive and, as shocking as it may seem, still M'd. My grandfather has really gone downhill in the last year or so, and I suspect we will not have him much longer. My father passed away in 2003, and that took quite a toll on my grandfather. No parent should have to out live their child.
Funny, I'm the flipside of that. My parents D'd when I was an infant. Dad remarried and remained M'd until he died. My mom, on the other hand, is on her 4th H now. We don't talk - long story.
Hi GIMA, yours is one of the threads I have been quietly following still.
I know what you mean about Church and sermons. For the better part of the last 2 years, there have been many times when I felt like there were words aimed right between the eyes, either for me, or my W, or both of us. Some of them left my then "still very much hung up on OM" W in tears, and she was rather stridently anti-religion.
As for your point about attractiveness of W and other women, some of it I find familiar. Weeks ago in my thread, I mused a bit about the potential pitfalls of detaching, and about dealing with the feelings of resentment and continual detachment (I don't think it's a process everyone can just switch off just like that) even as the WAS starts to see daylight or even does a complete turnaround and starts wanting the M too. The LBS may have moved on / been changed in ways beyond his / her control.
It's good that you have re-focused on what is really important and the hard work you have put into your M.
(Obviously) wishing you all the best.
Me 42 W 39 Married: 11 Jan 1998, T: Since 1992 First Bomb: Sep 2007 Confirmed A/OM: 4 Nov 2007 Kids: D10, S5 Reconciled and together again after (alot of) time and heartbreak. 3rd kid, S, born 2 Jan 2010.
I always wonder who is reading along and often forget that some do without posting.
I will have to check out your posts dealing with detaching. It is odd to find myself in a place where I am concerned (mainly for the kids) about my feelings for my W dying (she told me early on I slowly snuffed out her love for me - I know, scripta, but it's ironic given where I am).
GIMA, I have not posted much on your sitch, as you seem to be doing so darn well. Keep it up man.
One of things I had worried about to was detaching and NOT wanting to stay with my W, but I think you have to place those story telling future thoughts aside as well, as they will block your progress.
I am becoming a fan of living in the 'now' and not the past/future, where I seemed to be spending a lot of my 'thought' time.
M: 41 STBXW: 41 D: 9 Bomb: 4/26/09
On board the D train now..
"Suffering is when we try to change what we cannot."
I am becoming a fan of living in the 'now' and not the past/future, where I seemed to be spending a lot of my 'thought' time.
I think that's something worth remembering. Sometimes, I get way too focused on the future.
The future isn't what it used to be.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
