A Little Epiphany - (and a newbie delurking)

[Dia]

Well, my subconscious decided I needed a leg kicked out from under me.

I took a nap today in the big recliner chair in the LR and I had a series of those dreams that are so real that you think they *are* real sometimes even after you wake up.

I dreamed that H came over to the chair while I was napping, kissed me lightly and told me that he was here now and everything would be ok. I half woke up, smiled and said ILY. He put his arms around me and I held him so tight. I could actually feel him in my arms. I was nearly crying. We kissed softly but deeply. Still barely awake, I asked him how he had gotten here. He said my father had called him and told him to come. His hair was long like it was when we were dating.

There was a whole lot more but it went on in that vein. Complete sucker punch to the gut. Woke up (for real this time) looking around to see if he was really here and feeling like I'd been hit by a Mack truck.

And now I either have to pack up and go up there tonight, or get up at 4 am and go tomorrow morning. Sigh.

I'll get my head back in the game but day-um, that was hard.