C I understand what you are saying You took the high road you took the time to try to restore your M You set an example for your kids, friends and family You have grown , changed and learned
Your XH has done nothing except switched from wife to GF over again nothing will work..no R will REALLY work for him anyway until he fixes himself and if your Xh decides to not return: You will have another R again one day and it will be sucessful one day you will want to move on and you will youve been thru a lot so there is no timelines here you take as much as needed we cycle..let go..take back we are getting closer to the total acceptance and we will be free and healed in the perfect time peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
I am so tired. So tired of this emotional toil that i put myself through.
truthfully i don't dream of days of x coming home as much of grieving the loss of love and marriage and family. FAMILY.
just tired... and yes i believe i am my way to true acceptance.
i have knowone that i am dating, though i have been on dates. it is hard when they move on so easily - but they were done so much sooner (mine was) then i was.
by the time they tell teh bomb.. by the time it explodes they have contimplated and decided tehy were done.... me? i wasn't even on the same "ROAD" as him... i was on the one to the finish line.. he had taken a detour and i din't even know.
i just want to not be sad anymore i want to heal i want to be deeply happy alone or with someone i don't want my children to feel they have to be my happiness
i just want to be free of this..........
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
drama drama yet i still wonder - hope - can God break the walls of this mlc'r? hmmm i believe in miracles.. yes hmmm do i believe in this one? YES -
But still to be healthy to be good to me I move forward. You can't look back because the past really is gone. it is forward motion... have to heal, have to move forward.
still love? always still hurt? of course still want? what i lost yes
those are the thoughts that i/we have we move forward we heal. we must
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
It gets easier as time goes on. Remember you are not alone in this journey. Thinking of you...
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
I recieved my annual call (which does happen more then once a year) BUT this is the SAME call SAME time of year for the past 3 years...almost to the date!! (i have sent the text to my email and have emails from 2 1/2 years ago...did it to protect myself)
He called yesterday -- low/sad depressed. Talks of suicide again. Statements that he is thinking about how etc. Talked of putting himself in the hospital (which is a lie) I again told him that he has a credit balance with the counselor.. (my little lie) see he has no excuses anymore HE DOESNT WANT HELP!!!
.... AND THEN he brought up money. BUT OF COURSE. It is always about the money. What is sad for him is that I do think he is depressed (FOR REAL) I do know that he is struggling with stuff that is deeper and darker then just the MLC monster... it is real. BUT ..
What he does is lie. He was crying boo hoo.. die die.. and then throws in the amount of money that he says he doesn't have but I know he does. No not lots hidden, but I know the truth. He tries to use the tears..
He is out of control right now.
He was served papers by the sheriff for court on the 28th of September (with me) which he could have avoided by contacting the NC child support people when they called him.
He has lost a deep strong bond with my son (they were best friends)
He lost the bimbo (to a point..)
The girlfriend that he had d12 meet 2 weeks ago is now gone and out of the picture (how does he explain that one to d12?)
Child support is garnished from his wages.
His father had hip replacement surgery that did not go well - he (xh) has chosen NOT to call father-in-law...WHY? I DONT KNOW!!
******AND STILL it is not bottom*********************
I feel like that should be my signature line.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
do they ever hit bottom I think thy can hover for more time than most could they are survivors ..from a bad childhood You did well in the conversation though they still come to US no wonder his GF left..what would any sane woman do with a man like that? hang in Cage have a good weekend Peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
