I want my Monkey and Sheep Back

[SDFoundGirl]

Keep ignoring. There's no reason to respond...he's trying to continue to engage you. Bottom line, you have something he wants.

It still feels manipulative.

Can you imagine him looking a little like Marvin the Martian from Bugs Bunny, strange words floating out of his mouth and onto the page? I gave my H a nickname for when he was acting like the alien...for him, it was Phantom of the Opera because he was all serious and depressed and gloomy. For another woman on here, it was Woodtick, because she found them absolutely repulsive. It doesn't really matter WHAT you call them in your mind, but it certainly helped to depersonalize it for us and detach. When our H's were being normal, then we'd think of them as our H's. Aliens, nicknames.

Also, when you find yourself this upset or wanting to respond, one thing that helps is to get busy. We get this nervous energy inside, pushing us to respond, and it really helps to just get active. The summer I went through this, I must have walked 2-3 miles every day. I found the physical activity helped me work out that energy. I joined Meetup groups that met to walk and often just grabbed my keys and set off walking in my neighborhood.

My house was also never cleaner. H would do something hurtful, and I'd channel the energy into reorganizing the cabinets or sweeping the floors.

You have TONS of boxes to pack; every time you feel that urge, go pack a box. Or go for a walk. Or blast music as loudly as you can without bothering the neighbors and full-on dance for 10-20 minutes. I have to tell you, it is IMPOSSIBLE to stay upset when you're dancing to good music.

You're best tool is to get busy when those feelings hit.

IMHO, the emails are just standard alien spew. Poor H, and all he's had to suffer. Droopy Dog...Eeyore...everybody's always picking on him, and he would be SOOOO much happier if EVERYONE ELSE just acted to his liking. *sigh*

He's not happy with himself, on the inside, so there's no way he can be happy with anyone else. Same WAS syndrome.

You work on you. Find ways to make yourself happy.

SD