Just want my H back

[Deep]

Hi hhh, I'm not sure that talking to friends of his would be the best idea.

It's hard to predict how they would react, what they would say to H, and how H would react. And as objective as you may try to be, these friends will probably make some sort of value judgements.

In my sitch then (if you remember), I was very tempted to approach some of W's friends for help, but I'm glad I did not. She eventually did tell them herself ( a watered down version), and the impression I got was that they were sympathetic but were also firm on her. She was already on the way back by then, and it reinforced some positive things. But if _I_ had approached them ... I just don't know.

I did tell one of that group (friends of 20 year from high school - and I chose the one she was least close to) a partial picture, but that was when I was desperately trying to arrange a getaway surprise for her with her friends. It was a very uncomfortable situation.