I want my Monkey and Sheep Back

[beepee]

Thanks everyone, I get what you all are saying.
Its not like I want to keep this going, I really, really don't but I am finding it hard to let him say things about me that simply aren't true. Because it hurts coming from him, anyone else, fine, but him, its not fine. Because I love him and I feel the need to prevent him from thinking a certain way about me. But he's going to think them either way. I just need to shut up and forget everything he says. He is really, really, really, good at making me feel guilty. And I know I need to stop that. I need to control my own feelings whenever he tries to give me a guilt trip.

He said he was going to email me later on today and address everything because he's toooo tired now and he doesn't want to come across as negative and he says he tried very hard to choose his words carefully so as not to provoke me or be taken up the wrong way. He always says he'll address everything later because he is "too tired." And he never does. Just like when we were together. "We'll talk about it later, I'm too tired" and we usually don't. I'm going to find it very difficult to not answer him whenever he emails but I know I have to ignore it. If he says anything accusatory or mean or whatever, I just have to tell myself that I know its not true and thats all that matters. Boy, this is insanely tough.

But the good thing is I kept myself busy today. Didn't really have time to think about it. Right now, I'm relaxing after a hectic morning, listening to some music to keep my mood up. I just got back from a walk in this beautiful weather. I can't wait to go for walks in the city with different scenery! Its going to be great.