I know I did all of the wrong things also so now I need to back off. But I haven't heard anything from him since the beginning of May. That is when he moved from his parents to his own apartment and changed his cell number.
At the hearing I don't know if it sank in or not but I did tell him how much our D loves and misses him. At the end of the hearing as he was walking out he did say he would contact her. I just hope he does.
I have one big mess on my hands also but I'm trusting in God that he will heal my husband's depression and anger and bring him back home. My H can afford to go through with the D but I can't. He hasn't made any more moves so I'm just letting it go and hopefully not have to have anymore hearings and maybe he will calm down by then. I just don't get why he was so angry at me, I think he thinks that in May I turned our D on him which I would never ever do and he should know that from our 13yrs. together. She is the one that told her C that she was concerned about him and she is only 12. I didn't even know half of the stuff that was in the report, that was between her and her C. I just hope I got through to him that she does love, miss, and need him in her life. And that he felt good about that part. He also told my lawyer that he doesn't go to our D's counseling anymore because I threw my soda at him, which is another one of his lies. I did do it and I know it was wrong! It wasn't in front of our D or anything though. He just kept pushing my buttons by telling me everything wrong with me and kept knocking me down until I cried unbelievably and just got up and told him to stop and threw the soda on him. But he did attend the next session so that is where the lie is and I'm sure that is what he told his parent's and lawyer. But he is without a lawyer now, I think she dropped him because of all of the lies and not attending C and things like that, which were written in the C report.
Hi Jon,
How are things with you? I wish I could find someone on here near me to go out to eat with or get together with so there is someone that really understands what we are going through. Jon, I'm counting on your words as far as my H coming to his senses and also that God will help him! Jon, do you think it is too late since the hearing went so badly? Or maybe that is what we needed to get things out about the custody hearing he wasn't in there so only his step-mother knows what was said and I don't even want to know what she relayed to my H. He didn't even go in. I hope he knows that I do want our D in his life and he clears his head and knows that now. I guess he thought that I didn't want him in her life. I don't know. Sorry for going on and on. I'm just so confused. Then he claims he didn't receive our D's card and letter and that he didn't know about her graduation. Then in the next breath he says about my girlfriend calling his parent's house for the dress. And told me I should have called. I can't call there, they don't care about anyone in our household. They would just hang up, they are the ones pushing divorce and I'm going to call there.
Then Jon, he even thinks that you can look someone's cell number up on the internet. I told him that you can't you can only do a reverse check on a number but I don't really know if I got anything through to him at all. I did stay calm and not yell or anything like he did.
When you are feeling hopeless, just go back to the rejoice ministries site and listen to a message on there or read one or both.
Thats what I do when I start feeling a little down. It picks me back up.
Quote:
do you think it is too late since the hearing went so badly?
No. It is not to late. Just yesterday you said you were inspired to keep on going. Cmon now. Its going to be a long road. But you can do this. Just be patient and keep praying and get a life to take your mind off of things. It didn't fall apart over night and it won't be healed over night. Some people have to wait years for their S to heal and come back. Remember, it is all in God's perfect timing.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
But then again like one person said let God take care of her financial problems and it does say that on the rejoice ministries site right?
Does it say that on there? I didn't know it did.
Ya, just thinking it through.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
I understand what you are saying but you also have a hard time not thinking about your W and what is going through her head too don't you?
It has been a problem of mine for a while. I am still working on the letting go and letting God. I am doing better, but I still think about what is going on in her mind which I need to just flat out stop. I know I pray multiple times a day and use scripture to pray also. I just have to remember to keep my faith and trust in God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit no matter what my human eyes may see or my ears may hear. God is working on it. He will reveal it in his perfect timing.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
Thanks Kevin! I was on your thread earlier and read about you slipping up. Listen, you have given me sooo much hope how about giving some to yourself!
Go to the AA and C and complete everything, show your W the new Kevin and what he is and what he can do (being the best father and husband). You can do this!
Remember what other people told you on here also, if your W does file again it doesn't have to mean its over for good!
I wish I didn't think all of the time about my H but I do. I just don't get why the NO contact thing at all! He said he would contact our D last Monday and still nothing at all.
I will keep you in my prayers and please keep me up to date on how you are doing. Thanks for the threads from FaithfulH also. I'm going to go read them now. Maybe I can get some hope on his threads! I do go the rejoice when I'm feeling low and it does help so thank you once again!
It will be in God's timing for the both of us and everyone on this board!
I'm with you. I hope you enjoy reading FaithfulH's thread. It is a good one.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
