Kalni...devastation occurs whether you love your H or not. Many won't believe this but I still love my STBXW. I like what john and others wrote. It's how you handle this now...and how you grow with this...that counts.

You MUST....feel the anger right now or you will never grow thru this. You must embrace those feelings. And know something else?....you must EXPRESS YOUR ANGER to your H or you won't heal. Do it as constructively as you can. Time....will make the pain lessen.

Although Tomato feels I am jaded, much as I ..and others here...will support everyone trying to save their M....I will also not fall pray to the "they all come back after 2-5 years and you'll find that wonderful marriage you've been looking for your whole life"...when the pattern is nothing but lying, cheating, contempt and lack of integrity.

Hogwash. If one chooses to stand for religious reasons, I respect that. But to tell someone to hold on....or...flirt with your spouse and make them dinner when they've disappeared for 4 days.........

Kalni....this hurts. Been there. You need to stay really strong right now and most importantly, realize that this was not BASED ON YOU AS A PERSON.

Anger is OK. You cannot be expected to forgive your H RIGHT NOW. It will come...with time...at your pace. Take care of yourself. Exercising releases endorphins and helps.
Starting Over

FIB


Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11)
Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t
Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10
Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;