So, my therapist just called me. I love that woman, have I ever said that? She actually calls me when she has great thoughts to share with me....love that....and doesn't charge me either.
But I think she just saved my marriage or at least helped me to make a major improvement in myself.....
One of the things my H asked me to talk to her about was my temper....he wants to know what I can do about my "go to" which is to become mean, vindictive and threatening when I'm mad and we are fighting. I said Ok, if I am that way then I do want to make a change. I'll talk to her.
We talked about it and she said "If you are reacting that way then yes, we need to work on that. But I think Rob needs to cut you some slack here...for the last 9 months you've been in hell...how does he expect you to react all the time? With smiles and thank you for treating me like crap?" Did I mention I love her?
Well, she just called me and said "Look, you know H doesn't care for being yelled at. So we are working on that. But you also said you were bothered that he's trying to figure out who's been lying to him MORE....you or OW. Well, you can yell the truth at him all you want and be 100% honest.....but she can smile and speak sweetly to him....every word being a lie.....but guess what? He might be inclined to believe HER simply because she wasn't yelling. Stop yelling ADB....He'll hear you better when you're not."
