To be completely honest with you, I can't see where there was much of a backset. If I had been you, I would not have been able to hold it back as long as you did! But, she is not being truthful about OM! Plus the idea of thinking her H should be "understanding" of her and another man???
I am so far from being a person who would take verbal abuse that I can’t imagine why your W would put up with that creep. I can understand her being like a different person with OM than her normal character b/c I did the same thing. But, I am wondering if she’s not really “seeing” the man he is today and if she is thinking of who he was in the past. I suppose my mind can’t accept a woman stooping to such low life, however, we read about it everyday. Does she really think you are buying that lie about her breaking up with OM a couple of weeks ago? Then she turns around and expects you to be understanding? Well, there is no using logic with her, that’s for sure.
You might want to see what I wrote on Orich’s thread (Divorced not Busted 2) in Newcomers, about unconditional love. It amazes me what some people brand as “unconditional" love. I don’t really see how a person with any self-respect could be in a MR where they would sit back while their spouse did some kind of ungodly or illegal actions and continue to love them (in the way we think of loving) in spite of what they do. Maybe I’m the one with a warped mind but somehow I feel that if your stitch was turned the other way around…your W would not be feeling so “unconditional” about her love for you!
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
