What to do when H doesn't contact?

[K4D]

Just frusturation at times of not being able to see the work God is doing on the other side of the mountain. I keep faith none the less. Its a long story. But I made so many mistakes continually that DBing says not to do. My W basically ran from me and wants nothing to do with me. She said had I just moved out initially when it all started and left her alone, maybe she would have considered me now. But she says not now and not ever now.

My W claims that she forgot about the D date in court because she was busy with other things and told me that she would just refile. She hasn't done it yet. But I also know she has been hit with a lot financially. She also makes twice as much as me and does not need me financially which further enables her to move on. She has been dating guys that make twice as much as me and said she would have to really consider dating someone that only makes what I do. There are a whole bunch of things that have to be worked through for both of us.

It is going to take a while for the restoration to occur. God has a lot of work to do on her and me. I am leaving her alone now and forming my own life. But I still pray for restoration every day and multiple times a day. I use a lot of prayers off the rejoice ministries site. I just didn't let go and let God early enough to where it made things much worse. I was so attached to her I couldn't see straight to save my life. I refused to let go and I kept trying to talk to her and prove my love to her and it always made things worse and I just didn't listen. I listen now. Only God can restore this now.

She has absolutely nothing to do with me except if it has to do with the kids. She is now dating other people and has moved on from the A and me which makes it harder. Had I just left her alone during the A and took care of myself, I would be in a far better position with her now. But stupid me did not. She thinks I was psycho because I broke down and kept pointing out scripture and other things that I should not have pointed out, out of fear of losing her.

It really appears hopeless for those reasons and other mistakes I made that I am cleaning up. But I know with God thanks to that site that nothing is hopeless with Him. He brought people back from the dead. He restored Hoseah's M in the bible. He converted Saul to Paul and had Jonah swalloed by a whale to take him where he wanted him. A person's will means nothing to God. He said he can change a heart of stone into a heart of flesh. He can resurect my M and I believe he will in his perfect timing. It just requires a lot of patience and work on my part so He can do His part.

Most people told me that my M was a lost cause and to just move on. I started believing it for a while until I met FaithfulH and he took me to that website. That website really changed my outlook and dedication back to my M. I was pretty much ready to walk like you were even though I knew it was wrong. I just didn't see any hope as bad as things had gotten and knowing how strong willed my W is when she makes up her mind on something. She rarely ever looks back once she makes a decision.

But we have a covenant with God and he wants our M restored. I'm actually getting better about things. I have much more faith in him now than before and I will continue to stand.

FaithfulH and rejoice ministries were the biggest blessing I could have asked for. They restored my faith and my stand.

Kevin