Thank you Pigskin, I only hope he is willing to it. Before he left he said he did not see the point since he's already made up his mind (about wanting to end the marriage).
Of course in hindsight I see ways that i could have been more affectionate, boosted him up, etc. But he's also in a place of active rebellion and seems to have such a different personality. He's got this huge ego now whereas before most people would say I 'wore the pants' in our relationship. He's even told me I'm not the 'subservient' type wife... (i think he meant 'traditional') because i work long hours etc but truth be told, the plan was that when he graduated from business school and got his job, i could scale back and we'd start a family. now that he has the pedigree and all the attention, it's like I don't exist anymore. I know it's not all me...and most of my family and friends are telling me to move on. I am still very in love with him and am heartbroken that he wants to walk out on a marriage that yes, had some growing pains (several moves, parent dying, some illness that exacerbated things) but still a lot of good there. I just don't believe marriage is disposal. He says he tried everything before (like going to counselors, but i can tell you there were not marriage-minded in hindsight) and has given it his all. I disagree (but of course dont tell him this). He's been downright nasty to me in some of our exchanges - I think to justify his actions - seems classic WAS.
I feel so sad about this all but try to stay busy w my friends. I do not want to start my life all over again. I cannot imagine finding someone else that I feel like same way about. He was also my best friend.
I don't know what else to do if he doesn't give me the chance to show I've changed? I think I have to some extent in some of our interactions, but it doesn't seem like it matters anymore. Getting a new apartment and signing a lease I think has helped him psychologically move on. I just don't know what hope there is, if any, at this point.
It sounds like others are in the same boat. I welcome input! I really appreciate your support!
