Once again. You have shown you are a good person. Good people feel bad. You are feeling guilty. This is completely normal, but from what you have told us this situation is very serious. Verbal and emotional abuse can be just as bad as physical. Sometimes worse.
You have to make a commitment to getting yourself and your family help. If you dont stay commited you will never know if your H could have been helped.
You have a good plan. Run everything by your counselor. I agree about not giving 2 weeks notice. You need to get away asap.
Demand the RESPECT you deserve as wife and mother. Being a wife does NOT mean being an OBJECT. You deserve better. Hopefully, it will eventually come from your H if that's what you decide.
