Why do I get the feeling everyone is backing away from me?
Because that's what you are thinking. Change your thoughts and you change your feelings. Maybe FIL was trying to ease some tension by joking with you, maybe MIL is going to retire from doing taxes, maybe you are dreaming about what is dominating your thoughts. Your love for your wife is draining because you are hurting and not getting any of your needs met by her. It's a feeling, it's real and it will change.
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WTF, now Im being blamed for my dreams?!?!!!
And you can get in trouble for things you did in her dreams!
Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
Hey GIMA, man, your posts sounds like some things that have happened to me as well, probably a lot of people have these things happen.
Dreams. I have had the same type of ones as you have. I have come to believe that dreams are the way for the brain to work on negative issues, fight or flight stuff, high emotional issues, as they always seem to have components that are emotional in nature...
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So just now, my MIL walks in and hands me the electronic files for the taxes she filed for my business last year "so the person who does my taxes next year" will have that information. Great. Why do I get the feeling everyone is backing away from me?
Not much to say here that you probably have not already thought. You'll have to let those go, and not let them affect you as best you can. Move through the emotion that they cause, and then back to PMA, right?
If you have a minute, I'd like your thoughts on my latest posts, we seem to be on the same wavelength at times, and last night was another annoying one for me, but on unexpected thoughts/emotions.
I am praying for those things you need to help you through the day!
M: 41 STBXW: 41 D: 9 Bomb: 4/26/09
On board the D train now..
"Suffering is when we try to change what we cannot."
Before H and I got married, there was a ring he bought me in Lake Tahoe. It's gold, with a teardrop shaped amethyst stone. Purple is my favorite color, and amethyst is my favorite stone. When he bought it for me, I remember my eyes getting big because even though there was no proposal attached, I knew there would be in the future.
One of the nights I was staying at H's last time, dreamt that the stone fell out. It happened in slow-mo, so I could see the stone coming loose and tumbling down into oblivion. I woke in a panic thinking I needed to search the couch, find the stone at all costs.
So yeah, I feel ya on the dreams.
The trouble with having an open mind is that people put things in it.
My sitch - Divorce Busted! http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1804137#Post1804137
I'm sure it was painful to have your MIL hand over that tax info. It's as if they are writing you off before there has been any formal movement. Don't let it get you down!
You know what you're fighting for, but you also know you'll be just fine if the outcome isn't exactly what you want.
Take care GIMA!
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
Thanks everyone. I do feel like I am being written off, but I am working through that right now. Both my in-laws are on their 2nd M's, so I don't think D is seen as any big deal. I find that pretty sad and quite unacceptable!
Just a down day and a half. I won't let it win. I can't.
@Coach, My MIL has been retired for a few years. She volunteered to file my business taxes at my W's request. If W and I were still "together" there is no doubt in my mind she would still file the taxes for my business for this year since that will be the last year (I am shutting down that business). So, I will not let that bother me, but it is what it is.
I'm hanging in there. Just going to have to try that much harder.
It was only when I felt that I was written off that I finally detached and dropped the rope in my situation. Your heart can only take so much rejection before it completely shuts down. For me, it was when my W stated she was only sticking around for the kids...I felt abandoned. I had lost all hope for reconciliation. I feel you are getting closer to dropping the rope with each and every passing day.
Now that I dropped the D bomb on my W, our roles have completely reversed. My W is trying very hard to make our relationship work. I am finding it very difficult to reciprocate. My heart has shut down and it may require a miracle to allow her to re-enter. I hope your W "wakes up" before your heart shuts down.
Thanks, LFH
ME: 38 W: 35 D2.5 and S5 Married 12 years Separated (same house, different rooms) INILWYAM by W: 4/16/2009 The day W requested a D: 4/17/2009
You hit the nail on the head. I can handle the hurt, rejection whatever. My only fear at this point os that she will come around after its too late - like you said, the heart can only take so much before it shuts down. I don't want that to happen, but in some respect, I feel it is out of my control.
