In Limbo

[Stronger]

d1adsl5a
You get the hardest to figure out name on the DB board!

Here's some more hope for you....explains why you are fighting.

My H started an EA that turned PA. He left in November, started the PA in January, things were hot and heavy there, so much so he went to a lawyer and was so cold to me. Then at the end of January, OW drops him for a younger, RICHER man. She's now engaged to him.

But when things were bad around Christmas and January, he wrote me several emails that it was over, he was sorry, he took the blame for all of it, blah blah blah. In early May and again in mid May, I got emails that again, it's over, he's sorry.

I stood my ground. Kept DBing. I told him I will fight the divorce on the grounds we never sought MC. I'm pretty sure his lawyer (that he saw again in mid May) told him the same thing my lawyer said: Yes, you'll get your divorce, but she'll get her MC first because you have a son.

During May, H constantly picked fights and wanted me to "sign the papers". I stood my ground.

Here's where your hope comes in: Since about mid june or so, things have been much much better. We are ML again with more passion and affection. He's considering my feelings now. (Now I have to really concentrate to not push too hard for more since I've been so deprived for months now. Hard to do some days.) He planned my birthday weekend and it was fabulous. He even said "I have to make up for Christmas and Mother's Day here, so that's why" was his answer when I asked why he did so much. I was thrilled. (He got me nothing for either events, not even a card.)

But it went from "Sign the papers!! I want out of this marriage!" To "I have to make up for Christmas and Mother's Day here...."

He won't admit he's working on things out right, but he's alluded to it and I don't push. This is hard for him too. We talk a lot more. As a matter of fact, he's more opened now about what got us here where as before, nothing. And while much of that was very very hard for me hear (who wants hear how they screwed up) it's been vital to recovery.

You can do this. But listen to people here. They've been through it and are still going through it. But there are many many success stories here.

As one of my favorite DBers told me....you just have to be the greener grass.

I think more people would work through it if they realized the better comes after the worse.