Been a couple quiet days around here, which are really kinda rare it seems. One thing that has got to me is that it seems the W doesn't ever refer to me as my name to other people, she calls me other things. I don't think its evil names but never just who I am. A total refusal to say my name. I know its probably petty but it still hurts.
Rain, the reason she said why she distrusted me and thought I had something to do with it was that a couple weeks before the separation we got into an argument, she was acting as if she had NEVER done anything wrong in our R, actually those were her exact words and shes said it many times since. Well I finally told her that one day people would see her for who she is rather than this great facade she puts on and I asked her how she could sleep at night. I regret saying it. I know its true, but it hurt her deeply, I saw it then, and I know it now. Already people see through her cause they know Id never do the things that shes alleged, and when they speak ill of her because of what shes done, she assumes I must have said something to them or that I was spreading rumors... she cant get that they make their own minds up(and these are mutual friends, not partial ones.) I worry for her cause this is some serious denial on her part, I hope and pray somehow she either comes around on this or that somehow she misses me enough to seek me, then together we can fix this scary issue.
By the way Dave in Texas there's only a 2 month cool down period, and at the rate shes moving it will end within a week of that 2 months which will have it around early Sept, just in time for our Anniversary. I'm not sure how Ill deal with that becoming real, or moving all my stuff out of the house. I cant imagine going through all the stuff in the attic.....Right now, I don't have hardly anything from the house but its almost better for me thinking its there...
Last but not least, I go into and see an outpatient DR. tomorrow, to address my health issues. They told me that if they can do some minor surgery and correct me then they will do it on the spot, if not then it'll be rescheduled to a later date in a hospital. One small plus is that the W did want me to call her when I am done to let her know what happened. I wonder if she will answer, or just have me leave a message? Please keep me in yalls prayers.
One last thing does anyone know if someones spouse ever stumbled on here and read what they were writing, and used it against them? She knew of my Divorce Remedy book... I just wonder?
