I feel like stamping my foot and throwing a temper tantrum. (Now who is acting like a toddler?)
There are some moments when I think that I have seen it all and then I see something else. And I want to go "Aaaarggghhh", roll on the ground and pull out my hair like a toddler in the supermarket. Then the adult in me quietly says I cannot do this anymore so Jesus, take the wheel.
Goals for this week:
- Detach, detach, detach. The past two weeks have been rough. I am getting too caught up in this sitch. Too far away from where I was headed. I need to give this back to God and let him KEEP it. His will, not mine.( I usually pray this during the day). Part of my detachment will be by going dark. But I will still be polite since to do otherwise would let him think that he is getting to me.
- Compassion for him, compassion for me. I will not forget to be compassionate to myself.
- Paint my toenails blue. Hey, that one is just for the sheer fun of it. My boss is sure to love it.
- Above all, be cool, calm and collected. Don't let them see you sweat. Don't let them see you cry. Don't let them hear your voice tremble. H thinks he knows my number but he knows nothing of the new Kara. Nada. Zip. Zero. I am starting some 180s that will let him see who the new Kara is. And if he doesn't want her it is truly his loss.
