Hi Lost, I read through most of your thread. You have received excellent advice but you are not listening. You want answers. There are not answers. There are no quick fixes. Your h is gone for now. You cannot change that. You cannot db if he is not around but you can work on yourself. You need to detach and let your h go. You cannot fix him. You did not break him. He has to hit rock bottom. He has to help himself. There are no quick fixes. This is so new to you so please give yourself a chance to greive. The old m is dead. Grieve for the old m. Help yourself and your children through this. They need to go to a C. Your h has abadoned them. You have to get healthy so you can be the sane parent. It is so hard to enjoy life at first. You have to fake it. You have to go through the motions. Eventually you will enjoy life without your h. Eventually you will be a new you and you will like yourself more.
If it is mlc it will take a lot longer then 2 years. Depression is huge part of mlc and therefore most of the same rules apply. This will take a long long time. You will need more patience then you thought you had. You have to let him go to twist in the wind and pull up a seat on the curb. Your h needs to go on this journey on his own. Go to the mlc board and find the resources, I beleive they are pinned. It will give you some idea of what you are dealing with.
Protect yourself and your children finacially and emotionally.
