Well, yesterday we had our "talk". And as I thought, he wants us to go our separate ways. Still hasn't used the D word though. So I asked him your question, what's the urgency, why now? He said it was time, his feelings were not going to change, counseling won't help (we've never gone together - he was seeing a C on his own a few times & I saw one on my own. He is pretty passive but something - or someone seems to be pressing him to make this permanent. Maybe it's his best friend who he's living with since March (BTW who has been married - and divorced - 3 times!) I don't know. I just did my best to remain calm & he said, "you're being very measured, & careful w your words. Sounds like counselor speak". I said it's not counselor speak but true I am being careful w my words. He said I'd feel better if you'd cry or yell or hit me. Now mind you we had very few arguments while married & a very few that included yelling and NEVER hitting. Sounds like his drama queen roommate coached him on that.
Without going on & on @ the details, I ended the meeting (2 1/2 hrs!) by saying, we have to talk more, I need some time. We didn't even talk about finances, house or any of that stuff! (BTW he's not working right now, got laid off in June). I needed to buy some time while I figure out what to do. I am suppossed to say OK, because I don't want to say that. I want to continue DB'ing if I can but just not sure what to do next. (Aside from GAL & PMA). What do you make of this?
