For what it's worth, I firmly believe that my xW's deep-seated insecurities have been a major contributing factor in all of her character flaws, including those that led her to cheat on me.
Still, I do understand how a man can feel less unsure of himself because of events in his job/career. Men place far too much of their self-worth in their profession. It can deeply affect how they perceive how much respect they garner from family and friends. You, as his W, can have more influence on this than any other human being, for good or bad. I am sure you know this, and I also know how much of a burden this also places on you.
As if you don't already have enough on your plate, right? But that's what spouses do for each other, support one another wherever necessary, as partners. Ideally this should be balanced, but it often teeters from one spouse to another as each incident and stressor occurs.
Believe me it is no fun to be away from one's homestead for long periods of time. Perhaps, because you handle things so well in his absence, your H might feel he is becoming superfluous to the needs of his family? I am sure he wants reassurance that he is indeed still wanted and needed. I can certainly understand that, if so.
I could never convince my now xW that I still wanted and needed her. Her insecurities again. Even in the best of times, she always doubted me, at least a little -- in that she was undoubtedly a far tougher nut to crack than most of these troublesome spouses we hear of here in the DB forums.
