So H is putting me on no contact since he left Fri, oh actually Sat morning. Yesterday, even though a part of me said just leave him be, the softee/dummy in me called three times and no answer. I even sent him 2 text one that said what's up and then another late last night that said: "Hey sorry we didn't get to chat today. Hope you had a good day. Enjoy your night. Hugs." I know I know I should know better- total pursuit, but I wanted to show that I'm not mad or anything. Anyway, after that I said to myself enough that's it. I think Pup said something like this before that it's like punishing a child and then trying to pacify it, at least that what I was thinking - moreso sounds like something Pup would say. Anyway, so I did no contact today. I'm setting a short term goal, no contact until he reaches out to me. I so gotta do this. Please give me encouragement. He's the one not speaking to me right, so I should leave him be. I don't have a problem here, I just expressed my appropriate boundaries.
You know, the thing is, its not the time that H showed up that bugs me, I know we're late birds. It the fact that this is his usual habit to putting me last on his list after he's has spent quality time with friends and ow even. So I don't want to last on your list b/c I have the most convenience place for you to turn in at night.
Anyway I was a bit depressed though again today. I really do hate living alone. It's the pits. I felt lonely at home today. But trying to hang in there. I went out for a bit, then went walking with my friend, came back and listening to music. Great way to lift my spirits.
